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~ Artisan baked goods and chai in Austin, TX ~

 Luscious Pastry

Category Archives: Luscious gifts

Vegan Shortbread Cookies with Chai Glaze

26 Saturday Apr 2014

Posted by lusciouspastry in Luscious desserts, Luscious gifts

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bribery, chai cookie, coconut oil shortbread, tuba, vegan cookie, vegan shortbread

“How was your day at school, sweetie?”
“Not too good. The band director threw my instrument down the hall.”
“What??? How is that even possible? She’s only 5’2” and you play the TUBA.
“Well, she threw it pretty far.”
“Oh dear lord. I guess I better make her some brownies.”

tubaParenting is hard, y’all.  If your offspring’s behavior/lack of musical talent enrages an instructor to the extent that a 70lb brass instrument becomes airborne, there are several things you could do. You could give your child a good talkin’-to. You could request a parent-teacher conference. At the very least, you could ask what the hell happened right before the tuba took flight, but you know what, the Luscious mamas don’t always want to be burdened with the details.  Some situations are more quickly settled with food bribery.

Here’s what transpires next. Luscious goes into a culinary commando damage control mode that would intimidate a Navy Seal. An extremely decadent brownie recipe is carefully concocted. It is executed with military precision (like, Anne-Charlotte actually measured everything). The delicious treats are delicately frosted and boxed up attractively, no… irresistibly.  The final strike is set for after school a few days later:

“Hi honey, here’s the brownies. Quick, run these in to your band director before she leaves for the day!”
“I can’t.”
“What?? Why? TAKE HER THESE BROWNIES RIGHT NOW.”
“Today she was talking about how she’s a… a….”
“She’s a what ? What??”
“A… vegan.”

Motherfu…grrrrr! Why does everything have to be so freaking complicated?  How can Luscious manipulate you with baked goods if you insist on being vegan, band teacher lady?

SONY DSCFine, Luscious can deal. Time for Plan B. (Okay, actually Plan C, Plan B was “just give her the brownies say they’re vegan, gluten-free, cruelty-free, whatever she wants to hear” but unfortunately, the Luscious children prefer to tell the truth. It’s annoying.)  Even though the brownies were basically vegan if you didn’t count the butter, eggs, and cream, Luscious Pastry got back to the kitchen and got creative. The result: vegan shortbread cookies made with organic coconut oil and drizzled with a chai spice & almond milk glaze. And it is not easy to milk an almond, y’all.

Luscious has rabid butter loyalty, so this is really hard for us to say: These vegan cookies totally and awesomely rock. The kiddo said his band director was delighted to receive the cookies. She thought they were DELICIOUS! Heh heh heh, our plan is working…

The next week, after school on chair test day:
“How’d it go, honey?”
“Not good, mom. I’m still last chair.”

DAMN. Vegans are apparently quite principled, which is admirable yet irritating as fuck if you need to bribe one.  We’ll just have to try a little harder next time, Ms. Vegan Band Director… you can’t resist us forever.

vegan shortbread cookies

Vegan Bribery Shortbread Cookies with Chai Glaze

For the cookies:
½ cup organic coconut oil (solid but soft)
1/3 cup sugar
½ tsp salt
1 ½ cups flour
1/4 tsp cinnamon
2 tablespoons sweetened vanilla almond milk

For the glaze:
2 tablespoons Luscious Chai mix  (you can order it here)
1 tablespoon sweetened vanilla almond milk

or (if, tragically, you have no Luscious Chai)

1/8 tsp cinnamon
1/8 ground ginger
pinch cardamom
pinch ground cloves
2 tablespoons sugar
1/4 tsp vanilla
1 1/2 teaspoons sweetened vanilla almond milk
½ tsp coconut oil
¼ tsp cornstarch

Line an 11 x 7” glass baking dish with parchment paper. Preheat oven to 325º

Using a handmixer, cream together coconut oil and sugar. Mix in salt. Sift flour over the coconut oil mixture and use your hands or a wooden spoon or both to blend together. Sprinkle with almond milk and continue kneading with hands until the dough is smooth.

SONY DSCPress dough into pan in one even layer extending to the edges. Prick all over in a decorative fashion to prevent bubbling.  Bake for 25-30 minutes until lightly browned.

Allow to cool for a couple of minutes, then cut into bars while still warm. When cookies have cooled completely, remove from pan and place on a platter or cookie sheet in a single layer. Drizzle with the chai glaze, and place in the fridge for about an hour. Once the glaze has hardened a bit, store cookies in an airtight container at room temperature.

 

 

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Cat on a Challah Tin Roof

17 Wednesday Jun 2009

Posted by lusciouspastry in Luscious desserts, Luscious gifts

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Austin, baking, challah rolls, dessert, humor

Yes!  Luscious Pastry will be at Violet Crown Supper Club this Thursday. Since our corn muffins were a hit a couple of weeks ago, we’re going the bread route again this week with challah rolls: Jennifer’s homemade challah dough, baked as yummy rolls, perfect with Joel’s soups and veggies. Anne-Charlotte is really excited about the challah rolls, because she’s been looking forward to cracking jokes like “Our rolls will make you hollah!” and singing her own made-up Jewish-and-bread-themed lyrics to “Hollaback Girl”. The next time you see  her, you should quickly stick your fingers in your ears– you’ve been warned, okay?

Luscious Lemon-Blueberry Parfaits

Luscious Lemon-Blueberry Parfaits

This week’s sweet treats are taking the form of chilled Lemon-Blueberry Parfaits. Billowy swirls of cool lemon custard atop blueberry compote are an elegant antidote to these crazy hot temps. Lounge around in your sweltering house while wearing only a silky slip and slowly eating one of our cool creamy parfaits, and you will feel just as languidly sexy as Jessica Lange in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, especially if you bitch at you husband in a southern drawl between bites.  He’ll probably like it, even more so if he’s eating a parfait, too.

FATHER’S DAY– LAST CHANCE
Speaking of HOT! We have a few things still available for father’s day weekend:
– one mini Mahogany bundt cake
– 12 pecan pie bars
– 12 dulce de leche bars 

email us at apatterson@southerncombustion.com to order. 

COMING SOON Fourth of July cobblers and a Luscious t-shirt contest! 

 

WHO’S YOUR DADDY?

08 Monday Jun 2009

Posted by lusciouspastry in Luscious desserts, Luscious gifts

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baking, father's day, food, humor

pretty presents from Luscious

pretty presents from Luscious

Let’s be honest— father’s day is kind of a pain in the ass.  Luscious loves dads, but grown men are a notoriously difficult group for whom to purchase presents. Whereas most mamas feel like royalty on Mother’s Day if another member of the household will just fold a basket of laundry without being threatened, achieving the same effect on Father’s Day would require the gift of a Stratocaster signed by all the members of ZZ Top, a James Bond-style speed boat, or Heidi Klum. But to quote an old Yellow Rose radio ad (which is not something Luscious expected itself to do) “What else do guys like? Food.” Sorry Heidi,  delicious Luscious Pastry will be saving the day this year. And by the way, Mrs. Seal, don’t get any ideas about becoming the first Luscious spokesmodel, even if you are willing to be paid in Blackberry Crumble Bars. We’ve noted that your dress size appears to be significantly smaller than the number of children you’ve delivered, and that just makes Luscious want to cry.

But Luscious will NOT cry, because we’re pretty thrilled about making Father’s Day goodies this month. We’re offering our chocolate-glazed, espresso-infused Mahogany mini-bundts in cute gift boxes, and delectable Pecan Pie Bars by the dozen, also gift-boxed up.  And we’ll gladly  fill Father’s Day orders for other items, so if you think another Luscious treat is just the thing, or if you have something special in mind, just ask. Some might assume that Luscious Pastry is not in the same class as a cigarette boat that shoots flaming oil at pursuers, but Luscious suspects that if Miss Moneypenny had baked a Dr. Pepper Cake for 007, she could have gotten him to settle down. Email your father’s day order to  apatterson@southerncombustion.com, and we will co-ordinate delivery with you.

Also this month…. On Friday, June 13th, we will have a very limited number of Mahogany mini-bundts available, as well as a new item– Sparkling Lemon Bars. If you’d like us to reserve some for you, just email. And Violet Crown Supper Club is coming on June 18th, we’ll have some new treats…stay tuned….

The Luscious Blog

  • Cherry Amaretto Cobbler with Molasses Ginger Ice Cream
  • Rosewater Angel Food Cake with Fresh Strawberries
  • Vegan Shortbread Cookies with Chai Glaze
  • Póg mo Thóin Irish Coffee Brownies
  • Sweetheart Jam Cookies

You know you like it.

You know you like it.

Luscious Pastry tweets

  • This is brilliant.... fb.me/8yWed1qug 5 years ago
  • We've said for like, 10 years, there should be a Nobel Prize for cake, and obviously, this should win it. fb.me/6kspPRxA7 5 years ago

Contact us!

yummy {at} lusciouspastry.com
1.512.797.5034
Custom orders filled 7 days a week.

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